


How We Ever Came To Be

by untapdtreasure



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-22
Updated: 2018-04-20
Packaged: 2018-09-01 10:48:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8621563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/untapdtreasure/pseuds/untapdtreasure
Summary: She needed time to figure out how she was going to apologize for her attitude and words the night before. So far all she had decided was that she had to wait until she actually felt apologetic before even attempting to make amends.





	1. You Push All My Buttons Down

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos to the first person to point out the song that inspired the main title and chapter titles of this fanfiction.

The brand new camping equipment sat in the back of the rented midnight blue Jeep Grand Cherokee. Olivia glanced over at him as he concentrated on the road ahead of them. "Are you sure Amanda and Nick were the right choice?" Not that she didn't trust Nick with her life, but Noah was becoming more and more of a handful as he got older and had slipped quite easily into his terrible two's right on schedule. Nick was a seasoned vet where child rearing was concerned, but as far as she knew, Amanda knew next to nothing about child rearing. 

Rafael reached for her hand. "Liv, it's a weekend. Two days. You can call them at any time, and you know Noah loves that dog of hers. Nick is the most paranoid member of your squad." A vision of Det. Sonny Carisi flashed briefly in his mind which caused him to smile then. "Well, he used to be. Mom is just a phone call away. As well as Lucy. They'll be fine." He gave her hand a reassuring squeeze before he let their joined hands rest against her leg right above her knee. 

They were leaving the city behind for the weekend. This was desperately needed for both of them. Their jobs had been sucking the life from them the past few months, and their relationship had suffered.

It was her turn to squeeze his hand. "So you've been camping before?" She hadn't ever been camping in her life, but how hard could it possibly be? Both Amanda and Nick had seemed to enjoy it.

"Once as a kid. I don't remember much except that it was the quietest vacation I have ever had. We need that." He brought her hand to his mouth and kissed her knuckles softly. He smiled against her fingers. 

She tried to relax in the passenger seat, knowing she'd be more relaxed if he would have agreed to let her drive. She hated riding shotgun. Her eyes closed as he slowed down to take a ramp. "Quiet. I don't even know what that is anymore," she admitted. Not that she'd trade a quiet life for the one she had made with Noah. It would just be different than she was used to. She let out a soft breath as her head came in contact with the headrest. Her eyes closed slowly, trying to do anything that would bring her any sense of calm.

"Take a nap. We should be there within the hour." He held her hand gently in his as he drove. His mind had been going over the last few months, knowing that they were both at fault for the state of their relationship, but he had to admit that he had let his pride come between them. Something he was working on trying to change. He glanced at her and couldn't help but sigh. "Liv, you know I never meant to blame you, right? I shouldn't have said what I did."

She lifted her head, turning slightly so she could watch him. Her years of police work allowing her to see that he was being sincere. "We both said things we regret. It happens. Our jobs are stressful. I never wanted our relationship to suffer because of our job, but that was a bit unrealistic, wasn't it? We both bring it home. There's no way not to." She had spent the last almost twenty years trying to leave work at the precinct.

"Liv..." he started. He let out another soft sigh as he spoke a silent prayer.

So much for that nap.

\- -

The next hour and a half had resulted in them getting lost and had opened so many fresh wounds that she had regretted ever agreeing to this trip in the first place. "There's a gas station. Let's stop and get directions."

"I don't need directions. We have the GPS..."

"And we're still lost. Look, Rafael. I have to pee, and I need out of this car before I'm no longer responsible for my actions or the words that come out of my mouth." Honesty had never been an issue for the two of them. She was tired of trying to hold back her anger. It was doing nothing to diffuse the situation.

"Fine." He put on the blinker and turned into the gas station. He needed to stretch his legs anyway. She was right. The tension in the car was almost unbearable. He stopped the jeep and slammed it into park. "Happy?"

"Immensely." She unsnapped her seat belt and opened the door. She slammed it behind her and didn't bother to check if he had gotten out to follow her inside or not.


	2. Come On I'll Say It Slowly

She pulled out her phone and pulled up her texting app. Finding Nick's name, she quickly typed, 'How is Noah? Are you and Amanda sure you can handle this?' She stepped into the station just as she slipped her phone into the front pocket of her jeans. "Restroom?" she inquired. Once it was pointed out, she gave the girl behind the counter a smile of thanks before she went to relieve herself.

Upon exiting the bathroom several minutes later, she saw Rafael at the counter getting directions from the girl. She noted that he diligently wrote them down as she gave them to him. Her anger momentarily melted away as she grabbed two bottles of water and a bag of pretzels and made her way toward them.

He smiled as she placed the items on the counter. His hand moved to touch the small of her back. "Turns out we missed a detour five miles back," he admitted. "We aren't far from the camp grounds."

"Good." She paid for their things and slipped her hand into his as they walked out of the gas station and headed back to the Jeep. "Sorry about before..."

He squeezed her hand and assured her. "Me too, Liv." He turned then, stepping toward her and kissing her mouth softly. "I want to work this out." Losing her was an option he never wanted to explore.

"Me too." She kissed him again. "Let's figure out how to make this work. We deserve it."

\- -

They quickly unpacked, managing to work together without much direct communication. It reminded him of how they had been in the beginning of their relationship. He even started to relax as he cleared a space big enough for their dome tent. He looked up as she dropped the tent near the cleared space. "This shouldn't take too long."

They were two smart and very capable human beings, and how hard could it really be?

She unpacked the tent and spread out all the contents. She reached for the instruction booklet and flipped through it. "That's just great."

He finished spreading the large blue tarp on the cleared space and looked up. "What's the matter?" He frowned at the look of pure contempt that crossed her face.

"The instructions are in Chinese. There's nothing in English or the other two languages that I'm fluent in." She tossed the booklet away from her.

"It can't be that hard to figure out." He tried not to let this set back get him down. It wouldn't bode well for either of them. "If we work together..."

She sighed, pushing herself to her feet and dusted the debris from her pants as she did so. "Let's just do this." The sooner they got the tent up, the sooner she could, hopefully, relax. She already had the beginnings of a headache that seemed insistent on putting her to bed early that evening.

\- -

An hour later, she growled, "It's going to be too dark to see a damned thing soon. We're nowhere, Barba." She sat down on the ground in defeat. "We should just pack the Jeep back up and go home." This whole trip was destined to be a disaster.

"No. I've almost got this..." He had his tongue between his teeth as he concentrated on threading the pole through the loops on the tent once more. "Help me."

"Why? You'll just accuse me of doing it wrong." Her eyes rolled to the sky as he muttered in Spanish. She frowned before she scowled in his direction. "I can understand everything you just said, and it's not appreciated, Rafael. Not even a little bit."

His green eyes flashed with amusement, but it only lasted for a moment. "Lo ciento. Please, Olivia? One more try then we'll just pack up and go. I promise."

She let out a huff of air. "Fine." She moved to help him once again, and for the first time in an hour, the tent finally resembled the picture on the tent bag.

"About damned time," he muttered half an hour later as the tent stood erected in front of them. He watched as she started unrolling their sleeping bags. "I'll get the fire going so we can get something cooked for dinner."

Lightning lit up the sky.

"I thought you said that it wasn't supposed to rain this weekend?" she accused.

"It's not," he said in his own defense.

"Did you check here or the city?" she queried.

His face fell then as he closed his eyes. "Shit." He didn't dare meet her eyes as the truth started to fall lightly between them. "Just grab whatever you can and shove it in the tent."


	3. There's No One Quite Like You

They managed to get it all inside the tent before the bottom fell out of the sky. He managed to push her into the tent just seconds before he fell in behind her. He zipped up the tent and then turned to face her.

"I can't believe I let you talk me into this," she growled before shifting and removing her soggy socks and shoes. "I'm going to bed."

"Liv, this isn't how I wanted this weekend to go..." he started.

"Save it, Rafael. I'm wet and tired, and I don't have any fight left in me. Let's just try to sleep okay?" Her body curled inside her sleeping bag as she turned away from him. The pounding in her head felt more like someone was taking a jackhammer to her skull.

\- -

Both slept fitfully as the sky rained down on the tent. The lightning and thunder ceased around two in the morning finally letting them get a few hours of decent sleep from then until dawn. Something he was grateful for. He let himself out of the tent as the rain finally let up. He went to relieve himself and scrounge around for dry firewood, hopin he'd manage to find some.

She had heard him getting out, but she stayed where she was. She needed time to figure out how she was going to apologize for her attitude and words the night before. So far all she had decided was that she had to wait until she actually felt apologetic before even attempting to make amends. As it was, she was deeply annoyed with him and everything surrounding their entire camping trip.

He got lucky and found a dead tree that had been completely sheltered from the rain. The hatchet that Rollins had advised him to purchase had come in handy as he managed to cut enough wood that would make a decent fire before returning to camp.

Coffee was the first thing on his agenda. He knew she'd be grateful for it as well. He was more than willing to let everything from last night slide and just start over fresh when she got up.

\- -

The smell of coffee permeated the tent, enticing her to give in and get up. She slipped on a pair of clean, dry socks and slipped her feet into her still soggy shoes, then started to unzip the tent. She met his eyes for a moment. "Morning."

He gave her a soft smile. "Buenos dias, mi amor." He moved to her, brushing her hair down so that it resembled something somewhat tame before he leaned in for a kiss. His lips brushed hers timidly, not wanting to press his luck. "Sleep okay?"

"As good as to be expected." She sighed softly. She moved around him. "I have to pee." She grabbed a roll of toilet paper and her off duty service revolver. She moved toward the woods to do her business. "Hope that coffee is done when I get back." She would definitely need the jolt to get properly woken up this morning.

"Liv, what's the gun for?" he inquired as he poked at the flames beneath the coffee pot.

"Snakes or whatever else might be lurking around out there. Never leave home without it. Woods are no exception." She tucked it into the back of her pants and went on her way. She was desperate for relief at this point; her bladder full to the point of bursting.

He shook his head slightly as a smirk graced his lips. He hadn't even thought about snakes. Or anything else for that matter. He knew for sure that whatever it was, she would find him up a tree screaming like a banshee. He also knew he would never live it down.

\- -

After two cups of coffee between them, they sat huddled together around the fire more out of habit than out of need for warmth. His hand had come to rest on her lower back as he leaned forward to poke at the fire with the long stick that he'd kept for that very purpose. "So I've checked the weather, and it looks like we'll have sunny skies and a less wet forecast for the rest of our trip." He had hoped this news would sooth whatever anomosity remained from her anger the night before at the sudden onslaught of rain. 

Her head turned then, taking him in as she replaced the stick beside her against the log they were currently seated on. Her lips twitched into a grin at the worry in his eyes. "Sorry about my pissy attitude last night, Rafael. I guess you can take the girl out of the city but can't take the city out of the girl." Inexperience often made her defensive, and she was as inexperienced as she cared to be out here in the woods. 

He nodded, silently accepting her apology even if it wasn't exactly as he'd hoped it to be, but then again, he'd never really expected her to apologize in the first place. He took in her messy ponytail and blue jean jacket as he moved his eyes back to the fire once again. "Well, what did you want to do first? We got the fishing poles in the back of the jeep, or we can always explore the area; provided that you bring your gun." He shuttered slightly at the thought of snakes and whatever creepy crawlers that she'd brought to his attention earlier that morning. 

She chuckled softly then, nudging him with her shoulder as she teased, "What's the matter, Barba? Scared of a few snakes and bugs?" Her grin reached her eyes as she leaned in for a more warm feeling greating to their day.

As their lip met, he sighed softly completely content to just enjoy the day and whatever it brought them. Yesterday was over, and today was a different day. "Not with my big strong New York Police Seargent to protect me." He nuzzled her nose slowly with his own before giving her a gentle kiss to the lips before he stood and stretched his arms toward the trees. "So what'll it be, Liv? Fishing or hiking?"


	4. You're An Asshole, But I Love You

Olivia thought about her choices for a moment before she stood and reached for him. She pulled him close to her and kissed him with an underlying urgency. She nipped at his bottom lip before she pulled back and met his eyes. "Well, since we're not on any kind of actual timetable, why don't we crawl back in this tent here and welcome the day a bit more enthusiastically?" She took his hand and turned toward the tent, pulling him along behind her. 

"You know what, Liv? I always knew you were the brains of this outfit." Rafael pulled his hand free from hers and took her by the hips and urged her to go more quickly. He didn't want to spend any more of their time arguing when making up was so, so much better. 

She slipped her shoes off before ducking into the tent and onto the sleeping bags that they'd slept in the night before. She tugged off her jacket, tossing it aside and reaching to undo her jeans. 

He dropped to his knees beside her, leaning in to kiss her after removing his sweatshirt and t-shirt all at once. He started to reach behind him to zip the tent but decided against it all together. They were likely very much alone, and he didn't mind so much if all of nature saw them making love. 

\- - 

Several hours later, he grumbled behind her as he adjusted the pack on his back once again. "Are you sure you didn't shove all the heavy stuff into this pack and let yourself off with the dainty stuff that weighs next to nothing?" He didn't mean to sound as cross as his voice came out, but he was in desperate need of a break. 

She looked back at him and snorted. "You did not just accuse me of pulling the woman card, did you?" Her eyes rolled toward the sky as she stopped and removed the pack from her back and dropped it at the base of a tree. "If you need a break, just say so. You're not afraid to use that voice of yours any other time." 

She pulled a bottle of water from her pack and brought it to her lips to relieve her parched throat. "And I believe it was your idea to go hiking and fishing all in one go, so quit your bellyaching. This is why I left my toddler at home." Right now, she couldn't see much difference between Noah and her boyfriend. 

He dropped his pack from his arms and stretched his back to work out the kinks. "I was fine. We could have kept going. Don't stop on my account." He turned then, ignoring the look that flashed in her eyes and reaching instead for this own bottle of water. He brought it to his lips, drinking a good third of it without stopping. 

"Hey. Take it easy, Rafa. You'll be tossing your cookies if you don't." She pulled out the map from her back pocket and unfolded it. "We only have about half a mile to go if I read this map right."

He sat down on a fallen tree and looked up at the sky through the canopy of trees. "Okay. Just give me about ten minutes okay?" He reached for her belt loop and pulled her in front of him. He kissed her stomach gently as looked up at her. "You're not really mad, right?" 

She rolled her eyes again, folding the map quickly and replacing it back into her pocket. She took his face in both of her hands and bent to kiss his nose first then his mouth. "Well, I was, but I'm over it. You're too adorable to stay mad at for too long." She shifted, sitting on one of his legs. She was now only slightly taller than him. 

"Good," he mumbled as his face came to rest against her neck and breathed her in. "It's nice up here. I mean, it's a little too quiet, but nice, don't you think?" 

"Definitely." 

\- - 

Less than half an hour later, the lake came into view. He spotted it first, causing his step to quicken. The sooner they got there, the sooner he could get this pack off his back until they headed back down to their campsite. "Oh, Liv," he breathed as he stepped off of the trail and onto the slightly rocky, slightly sandy lakeshore. 

She stepped into the opening with him, grasping his hand and taking it all in. The lake was shiny and dark and more beautiful than anything she had seen in a long time. She took a deep breath. "You can't see things like this in the city." She wanted to bring Noah here as soon as he was old enough. 

"No, no, you can't." His eyes weren't on the view any longer, but they were on her and how she looked in that moment. He squeezed her hand. "Are you still upset that we decided to do this?" 

She tore her eyes away from the water and looked at him. "Not one bit. Thank you, sweetheart. We really did need this, didn't we?" 

He leaned in to kiss her softly, bringing his hand up to the side of her neck as the kiss deepened. As the kiss ended, he leaned his forehead against hers and met her eyes. "We really did. Olivia, I love you." 

"I love you, too, Rafa. Very much." Her free hand grasped his elbow gently as he held her neck. She smiled softly before she pulled herself from his embrace and began to lower the pack to the lakeshore. "But I have a serious question? So don't laugh." 

He couldn't stop the chuckle that escaped his slightly open mouth. One look from her silenced him into submission. "Okay. Okay. I won't laugh. What is it?" 

"Have you ever in your life baited a hook?"


End file.
